How to resign a pastoral position
Let’s be clear, I am not urging anyone to quit! The question of how to resign well comes up often, though, for my coachees and in clergy groups. Thoughtfulness around your announcement will make your remaining time in your current context more pleasant. It will also allow you to be a leader as much through your leaving as through your pastoring up until this point. Here are some commonly asked questions about submitting a resignation, along with my responses:
Whom do I tell first? Before there’s a congregation-wide announcement, a departing pastor will typically want to tell a few individuals in the church. Most obvious is the person or group to whom you are primarily responsible, such as a personnel committee. If you are not the lead pastor, your supervisor will also need to know. And there might be others who get a heads-up, such as people in your church who have served as references, other staff or lay leaders with whom you’ve worked closely, the chair of the search committee that called you, or the chair of your congregation’s governing board. (Don’t neglect to inform your judicatory leader as well, if that person has not been involved with your search.) Keep in mind that there might be some people who don’t need to know your news before a congregational announcement but who will merit one-on-one conversation afterward, such as church members to whom you’ve become close.
When do I start telling people? Remember that if you are going to another congregation, the folks there will be excited about you. They will start spreading the word as soon as your call is official (and sometimes before, despite requests to the contrary). The people in your current context need to hear your news from you, so cue up conversations or communications so that you’re ready when the call is finalized.
What do I say? This is hard. You’re moving on for a reason, yet you’ve put a lot into this church you’re leaving and the people there. Here’s an outline that can help scaffold your announcement.
Acknowledge bittersweet nature of news you’re about to share (e.g., “It is with mixed emotions that I tell you…”).
Tell where you’re going and what your role will be (if applicable).
Name your last Sunday and last day in the office.
Give a brief explanation about why you’re leaving (e.g., “I wasn’t looking, but the Holy Spirit nudged…” or “Because of changes to my/our situation, I’ve/we’ve felt the need to…” or “Because of all the ways you have encouraged me and helped me grow in ministry, I now feel ready to…”).
Identify a couple of things you are grateful for about your current congregation.
Explain how you are working with others to make sure gaps are addressed in your absence.
Share how you’ll be spending your remaining time (e.g., “I will be prioritizing…” or “I will be in and out as I try to sort out details here as well as in my new home, but I will be paying attention to [tasks] over the next [time until leaving].”).
What should I expect after my announcement? Well, you and others will feel all the feels. (Read more about this here.) Also, you might feel a frantic energy to tie up every loose end or an utter lack of motivation to get things done. If the former, decide what is most important (hint: it will probably be relationships) and lean into it, knowing you will not get everything done and giving yourself grace for that. If the latter, make sure you have at least transferred passwords and knowledge that lives only in your head to someone else or to a document that your successor can access and offered some sort of opportunity for closure with you.
Giving people news they don’t expect and don’t want is always hard. Plan for self-care afterward and through your remaining time. And if you need help leaving well where you are and starting well where you’re going, contact me or schedule a call to find out how I can coach you through those two important periods of your ministry.
Photo by Mantas Hesthaven on Unsplash.