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Helping clergy and congregations navigate transitions with faithfulness and curiosity

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What kind of self-care do you need right now?

We all need to take time to tend to ourselves. This is not being selfish. It is being practical (humans require regular down time and maintenance), and it is being faithful (God did not make us to go without stopping until we break).

The term self-care has become so all-encompassing as to become almost meaningless, however, without carving out some smaller categories under that rather large umbrella. Here are some kinds of self-care that I think we all need in varying amounts:

Escaping. Sometimes we simply cannot deal or are so tired that we need to withdraw until we recover, though I’d add we probably require less of this kind of self-care through passive consumption than we think. This is a good time to read a novel or binge tv shows on our favorite streaming service. (Note that I do not advocate numbing through substances.)

Tending to health. We are worth taking care of our bodies, minds, and souls. We deserve to be treated by professionals who see and value us and want to help us live well. Seeking out doctors and therapists and spiritual companions can be hard because we feel fear or shame, because good care options are hard to access or pay for, and because it can take big chunks of time, but it also feeds all other forms of self-care.

Completing the stress cycle. In their book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, Amelia Nagoski and Emily Nagoski talk about how stress lingers beyond the stressful situation if we do not go all the way through the feeling once we’re in a safe place. Often we need a physical action to help with this, like punching a pillow, yelling at the top of our lungs, or dancing it out.

Having fun. Screen/life balance expert Catherine Price encourages us to play more in her book The Power of Fun: How to Feel Alive Again. She identifies three characteristics of True Fun, which are playfulness (no judging self or others), connection (with God, people, or the environment), and flow (being fully present and engaged). I think we all need a lot more of this kind of self-care than we usually get.

Intentionally doing nothing. Brene Brown talks about no-agenda, non-doing time in which we simply allow ourselves to be. We’re not trying to produce. We are simply giving all aspects of our being a break so that we can return to ourselves, trusting the world to go on while we’re not doing something to fix it.

What other self-care categories would you add to these? Which kind of self-care do you need most right now? How might you get it?

Photo by Max van den Oetelaar on Unsplash.