I vividly remember a particularly strenuous afternoon of yardwork after Matt and I became first-time homeowners. We were playing tug-of-war with the mother of all weeds. (Seriously, this subterranean nuisance ran the length of the backyard and manifested in hundreds of shoots.) As I sweated and yanked and complained, I said, “I honestly don’t know where people find time for leisure. If I’m not at church or thinking about church, I’m adulting in some other way – cleaning or going to the doctor or working on taxes or trying to thwart this weed’s plan for world domination.” (And this was long before we added a kid to the mix!) I was doing a horrendous job of carving out space for replenishing my body, mind, and spirit, and I knew it. What I didn’t know was how to make needed changes.
Self-care is hard. There are so many demands on our time and attention that we experience guilt when doing something for ourselves. It seems indulgent. We worry what others will think if a task is left undone. It feels negligent. It’s not, and even when we know that intellectually, it’s still tough to push self-care back up the list of priorities. (When we don’t, then we often beat ourselves up for not doing what we “should” for ourselves.)
If you’re caught in this cycle, let’s talk strategy. I’m offering a free webinar around planning for replenishment on Thursday, November 3. I want to empower you to imagine a new way of being and prepare you to design and calendar specific self-care actions. In our time together we’ll cover framing self-care theologically, naming what you need to be a healthy person and pastor, identifying patterns that obstruct needed self-care, assessing priorities, thinking outside the box about available resources, creating mechanisms for accountability so that you follow through on your actions, and learning to give yourself grace when tasks are left undone.
I’m not hosting this webinar because I’m a self-care pro. I still struggle too. But I’m constantly re-patterning my brain and my life to grow in this area, and I’m learning some tricks along the way that are worth sharing. Sign up here to join me in this journey.